August 27, 2012

On the morning of August 27, 2012 I was in the middle of a meeting when I received word that there had been a shooting at my sister’s school, Perry Hall.  Obviously a flood of emotions hit me as I wondered about my sister’s well being and the many ‘what if’ questions raced through my mind.  I got teary-eyed as I considered the possibility of the worst.  We tend to value people the most when there is a possibility we will not be able to see them again.

Over the course of the day, information leaked about about the shooter, the victim, the heroic actions of my sister’s guidance counselor and many other details.  Apparently the 15-year old gunman’s father said that he had been bullied.  Looking at court records show that this child’s home life was not what anyone would consider’ideal’ or ‘healthy’.  One student was shot, a disabled student who was part of a special needs program.  Fortunately in this case there were no fatalities and the student who was shot has been able to return home.

September 11, 2012

On September 11, 2012 a student at Stemmers Run Middle School brought a loaded gun to school and began waiving it toward fellow students and his teacher when the teacher knocked the gun from his hand and held the student so that a resource officer could come and secure both the student and the gun.

B3: Before Bullying Begins

It was these two incidents in our community which led my friend Pastor John Smith of FBC Essex to launch an initiative called “B3: Code Blue”.  Code Blue is a code in the medical community that sounds the alarm on an emergency situation.  In many cases a Code Blue refers to a cardiac arrest a.k.a. a heart attack.

As I reflected upon these incidents as well as the general condition of our culture I have found that the term Code Blue is fairly appropriate.  Bullies are suffering from a condition of the heart.  

I had the honor of speaking at a community rally just a few weeks ago where civic leaders, pastors and neighbors stood shoulder to shoulder to make it known that it is our responsibility to re-develop our culture so that none of our students become either the targets of bullies or actual bullies themselves.

There is an old expression I heard many years ago that changed my view toward those who cause harm in many cases: “Hurt people hurt people.”

The reality is that most bullies are victims themselves.  Most bullies are insecure.  Many bullies are bullied at home by their parents or siblings.  A culture has been developed around the bully that trains that person to behave in such a way as to build themselves up by putting others down.

So how do we put an end to bullying?  

In a word: Respect.

As a society we must raise the bar of discourse in our nation to one of respect.  Respect in the family, respect in the community, respect for authority and most importantly respect for one’s self.

In the home we must teach parents to talk to their children in a healthy and respectful manner.  Far too many children are living in homes where parents are passing down poison to their children.

In the media we must protect our children from images and messages designed to demean the individual.  This can be as simple as a beauty magazine giving off a false impression of a healthy body image or as complex as political discourse where a child sees grown men and women angrily raising their voices with people who disagree.

In the school we must promote a healthy respect for teachers, peers and custodians.  Students are far too often allowed to propagate poor behavior because adults remain silent.  A more concerted effort must be made to stop disrespect everywhere we see it.

My heart is to see a day when my son or daughter do not have to worry about being bullied.  I am not with my children during their entire day but if I as one adult can help to make my community better by championing the value of respect I will do so.

Respect does not mean that we will agree with all of our neighbors beliefs, respect means that we will not treat our neighbor poorly because of their beliefs.

I encourage you to work in your daily life to take ownership of respect in your community.   We would love if you would stand with us at B3 by visiting our Facebook page and let us take proactive steps “Before Bullying Begins”.  

 

Dear Homosexual Friend,

I’m writing you this note because I just ate Chic-Fil-A.  Some of my Christian friends around the country also just finished eating Chic-Fil-A.  Some of my other Christian friends got mad at those of us who ate Chic-Fil-A because they said that you, my homosexual friend and neighbor, may view us as intolerant, hateful bigots.  

I wrote you to personally inform you that my friends who ate chicken today did so not because they hate you but because they hate bullies.  

I know that you understand all too well how it feels to be bullied.  Sometimes you just have to stand up to the bully by eating a chicken sandwich!  All kidding aside, this is a 1st Amendment issue, not an attack on homosexuals.  Let me explain.

No one likes to be bullied.  It’s not a good look, for anyone.  Basically because a Christian man shared his religious views some people with governmental control decided they would intimidate and harass this man’s business by using the power of the government.  That’s bullying.  Bullying is bad.  The 1st Amendment protects personal speech from government punishment.  These Mayors weren’t playing nice so a lot of Christians wanted to tell the government to back off.  People in government like to count votes and they understand the power of the purse.  So a bunch of people ate Chic-Fil-A today.

I’m sure at times you feel that people who claim the name of Christ are bullies.  I’m sure you’ve seen that inbred group of people known as Westboro Baptist Church on TV.  They are not Baptist and they aren’t a church.  They’re bullies.  It seems that the 8 of those people have multiplied like zombies because every time a media source wants to show how intolerant, hateful and bigoted my chicken-eating friends are, they show the same 8 people from different angles.  They’re always sure to show you the same 8 signs too.  Actually they show you file footage as well to make it appear that there are about 200 signs being carried by these 8 people.

Can I let you in on a secret?  

I was actually picketed by those hateful people once.  My crime?  Attending a worship service at Dr. Jerry Falwell’s Thomas Road Baptist Church.  You read that right… Those 8 fruit cakes that the media keeps showing you protested AGAINST another guy the media made out to be a hateful bigot.  He wasn’t.  I promise.  I got to see him up close when I was in college.  You would have liked him if you knew him personally.  Larry Flint did.  Al Sharpton did.

Larry and Al disagreed with Dr. Falwell on social issues but they liked him personally.  That is possible.  Anyway, do you know what Dr. Falwell had done to deserve getting picketed by the bullies of Westboro?  He invited gay leader and president of Soul Force, Mel White, and about 300 homosexual activists to Thomas Road and Liberty University for a discussion.  Dr. Falwell fed them and set up civil conversations on the campus.  I was there.  It was peaceful.  Isn’t that crazy?  Gasp!  Shock!  My guess is that you didn’t even know that happened.  Funny how that works huh?

Anyway, I wanted to let you know that I did eat chicken today.  I didn’t do it to be hateful or mean.  You know that.  You’ve been around me enough to know that I’m aware of your position and you’re aware of mine.  We’ve had great discussions and we treat each other with civility.

Okay, so I have another reason for writing.  I want to make certain that you know that you’re invited to my church, Captivate Church.  I must warn you though, the pastor (me) is a sinner in need of a Savior.  He’s said from the pulpit that every day he has to repent and pray for God to lead him because left on his own he was born with a proclivity to disobey God.  He said something from the stage before about the Apostle Paul expressing the same feeling in 1 Corinthians 9:27.

Also if you come to Captivate I want you to know that our church is messy.  Our people remind me of the box of toys from the movie Toy Story.  As you are welcomed in the parking lot it may be by a recovering drug addict.  You will almost certainly be greeted along the way by people who have had premarital sex.  The usher may or may not be a person who had an affair.  Once you sit down you are likely going to be sitting near someone who looked at porn recently. Captivate has tons of stories of what Christ has redeemed people from… prostitution, addiction, abuse, depression, abortion… I hope this doesn’t offend you.  

In September we’re actually doing an entire month of sermons based off of the stories of our people.  We want to brag on God.  He’s cool like that.  

Some may consider this embarrassing.  We consider it home.

I should warn you though.  You may think that because we have so many broken people that Captivate is one of those churches that just tells everyone to ignore their sin and take advantage of God’s grace.  We’re not one of those types of churches.  Many of those types of churches seem to be satisfied with you showing up.  Captivate is about helping people grow up into the promise and potential that God has for every one of us through His Son, Jesus Christ.

You see, that guy in the parking lot who is a recovering drug addict knows that God’s perfect plan doesn’t include drugs.  The adulterer who is trying to restore his marriage with the woman across the room knows that God’s best plan isn’t found in fulfilling his sexual appetite outside of his home.  The girl who had the abortion knows that her true love isn’t found in any man but only in Christ.  On and on it goes…

The porn addict, the alcoholic, the prostitute, the promiscuous young woman and the guy who is smoking weed all have something in common:  They are in love with God who has a better plan.

So if you can tolerate the messy people you meet along the way to your seat, buckle your seatbelt because the pastor is going to preach from the bible.  In our church people joke that they wear steel toe boots because sometimes the holiness of God steps on our toes.  It can seem like a strange thing at first but the people who love Captivate aren’t there because they want to be told how great they are.

The people of Captivate want to know how great God is.

The more we learn how great God is, the less we want our own sinful ways to define our lives.  At Captivate we don’t label each other by our sin.  Chances are, you’re not going to know who struggles with which problem until you get to know them up close, in the context of loving community.  At Captivate and at every bible-believing Christian church the people wear a name tag that is above every name; that name is Jesus.  It’s tough carrying His name at times because we know that on our best days we are an imperfect picture of Jesus Christ but in spite of that we are called to re-present him to the world.  

So anyway, I ate chicken today.  I ate chicken because I want the government to know that people don’t like bullies.  I also go to church with a bunch of sinners and misfits that celebrate every week because they are made new in Christ.  You are free to come visit too, just don’t judge us, we’re all just trying to pursue God’s best plan for our lives.  

Captivated,

27 So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them.  28 God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground. ”

– Genesis 1:27-28

In the beginning God’s perfect plan was to bless His people.  Before sin.  Before the Fall.  Before the need to apologize was a God who blessed.  This blessing spirit is even more powerful when you consider that this blessing was given to man before they did one thing, good or bad.  Having done nothing man was simply blessed for being God’s child.

Fast forward to today and obviously we’re on the other side of the sin equation.  Our lives are indeed marred by sin and it’s consequence but there is available to us a redemption and a reconciliation through God Himself, Jesus Christ.

21 God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God. 

– 2 Corinthians 5:21

In most churches, and with most Christians, I get the sense that the first part of Paul’s charge in 2 Corinthians 21 gets no dispute.  God made Christ become sin for us.  We accept that whole-heartedly.  No dispute, no argument here: God made Christ to be our propitiation.  What I do find however is that we are not often ready or willing to pick up the second half of that verse.  Why did this act take place?  Why did God the Father see fit to saddle Christ not only outwardly with our sin but to actually see Christ as BECOMING sin?  Whenever you see a “so that” in scripture you should get out your highlighter… “so that” we might become the righteousness of God.

I believe if Christian men and women would see themselves as God sees them, so much sin and strife would simply no longer appear in their lives.  Why?  Because we live up to our expectations of ourselves.  If you see yourself (after salvation) as nothing but a worthless sinner, you will continue to repent for being such a worthless sinner.  If, however, you see yourself as the righteousness of God, you will spend far more time living up to carrying yourself in such a way as to be worthy of that name.

Yes, you and I are sinners saved from ourselves and sin’s consequence only by the atoning sacrifice of Jesus.

We too however are also the righteousness of God for our generation.

We are not worthy but we are worth it because our value was determined at the cross.  This paradox is what gives the follower of Jesus the simultaneous power and humility that comes with knowing Christ as Lord.  We are broken people made righteous by the act of their savior.  We are spiritually dead given life so that we may give life.